Tuesday, 1 May 2012

Five Sentence Fiction: Explosive



Her t-shirt soaked through in the downpour, stuck to her back, “Got…to get him…away from here…” she puffed, her words whipped out of her mouth as she spoke.
“Where to?” groaned her friend spitting her hair out of her mouth as the wind swept a sheet of rain across the lane.
“Is he dead? Really dead?” the third girl could barely feel her hands as she clutched the man’s sodden jacket as they dragged him through the muddy track.
The first raised her head and nodded, ignoring the rain dripping off her nose, and the three of them heaved succeeding in hauling the dead weight a few more feet towards the ditch.
As they paused for breath and to regain grip, the street light above them exploded and sparks flew through the torrents of rain…and the heavy bulk within their grasp opened his eye…

Photograph by Bekah Shambrook

5 comments:

  1. I really like this. Its the first five sentence fiction I've read. Nicely done!

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  2. Good stuff. I have so many questions and I was left wanting to read more! Was this a potential hit and run? Did the 3 girls hit the man and were they going to just move him and drive on? Did he eventually die? Did the girls get caught? Did they stay with the man when they realized he wasn't dead? Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed it.

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  3. Good one. I was on the edge of my seat. I particularly liked the way he opened his 'eye' and not his eyes. Now I'm really wondering...

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  4. Thanks, Ang you should join in, FSF is fun and has really stretched my writing! Andy, this is what I love about FSF, you've had ideas that didn't even enter my head! We all see things so differently. Sandra, isn't it great how we all interpret not only the prompt differently but how we see each story differently?

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  5. Wow! Such an interesting take on the prompt. Now I'm left wanting more!!!

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