Monday, 30 July 2012

Five Sentence Fiction: Perseverance and Visual Dare: Above

I had trouble with both words this week, so decided to combine them: Lillie Mcferrin's Five Sentence Fiction: Perseverance and Anonymous Legacy's Visual Dare #15 Above The picture comes from The Visual Dare prompt:
Five Sentence Fiction: Perseverance:

When he got down on one knee – in the balloon – I grinned, this was it, this beat anything he’d tried before, the mountains rose around us and I grasped my hands together in excitement.
“Will you…will you do me the honour…” he paused and I watched his Adam’s apple rise and fall in a huge gulp and this time I felt his pain, all the times I’d said no came streaming back and I felt genuine sorrow for the many times I’d hurt him in rejection.
I joined him on my knees and took his hands in mine, and the basket embraced us hiding all the grandeur.
I no longer needed the mountains, or the vista, or even the damned balloon, all I needed was him.
“Yes,” I didn’t need to hear the question this time, “Yes, yes, yes, I’ll marry you!” and this time his smile meant more to me than the highest mountain, more to me than anything.

Visual Dare #15: Above:

When I went down on one knee, I managed to squeeze out the words, “Will you…will you do me the honour…” I swallowed hard not sure whether another rejection was even bearable at this height. I stared into her eyes trying to will the proposal to leave my dry throat, but she sank to her knees and grabbed my hands, and suddenly I saw what I’d been searching for this whole time. The love in her eyes shone as she accepted and my reflection in her eyes was more beautiful than all the mountains reflecting in the lake below. “Yes.”

(100 Words)


  1. This is great, loved how you showed both sides of the same story. Just shows you should never give up if you want something bad enough.

  2. Lovely! so romantic. And a good idea combining the two prompts and showing both sides of the story. Well done.

  3. Aww... That is so sweet! I love it! I really enjoyed reading it from both perspectives. Great job!

  4. I agree with the other comments, dear Lisa. A fun and insightful writing idea to combine to show both sides of this romantic story. You romantic woman, you! :))

  5. Gorgeous!!! About time she realised! Beautifully written from both perspectives Lisa. xxx

  6. WOW. What a GREAT idea, to use the two prompts to bookend each other! May I say that I think they are both splendiferously brilliant...not to mention that the previous rejections make the balloon-ride proposal that much sweeter. LOVE!!!!!!

  7. Aw, thank you, I struggled with these two separately, but the idea to combine was instantaneous and his proposal was accepted!

  8. I love how you combined the two prompts to show both sides so beautifully! I really like how you took a popular idea (the balloon proposal) and made it your own and gave it life. Great job!

  9. That was so romantic! I love that you had your own spin of the theme, and decided to do something different with it. Great job!