What I'm From
I'm from shyness and watching,
from standing as still as possible,
in the vain hope that the butterfly
would land on my outstretched hand.
I'm from swinging as high as I could,
'til the chains went slack and the seat would jerk
and my heart would leap right out into the sky.
I'm from blackberry stained fingers
in the Three-Cornered-Copse.
I'm from home-grown garden peas
with a crunch and rainbows
without beginning or end.
I'm from reading under the covers,
feverishly trying to finish the book
I'm from walking my paper-round,
autumn's fragrance in my senses.
I'm from daisy chains and buttercups,
and standing in pouring rain,
drops bouncing on the pavement,
watching lightning far out to sea
and thunder crashing
over our heads.
I'm from geography field trips
and love at first sight.
I'm from scrawling my name
on park benches
and climbing fallen trees in eighty-seven,
and singing and giggling of love
and feeling free...
I'm from dreaming of a future
that would never be.
I'm from finding myself...
I'm from long flowing skirts
and Doc Martens, swishing
and clumping down the street.
I'm from red telephone boxes,
a church step and friendships.
I'm from wild racing, stereo blasting,
exhilaration, dark lanes and headlights.
Halloween and a spark
on Devil's Dyke.
I'm from walking barefoot
in the winter's sand,
crying in the rain, losing a promise,
but winning a battle.
I'm from diaries and keepsakes,
photographs and memories...
Parents listening in the small morning hours
when all I wanted was to talk...
of love, loss and life.
I'm from leaving past loves behind,
forming an eternal partnership...
and a broken heart loving
like it has never loved before.
I'm from delight, anticipation,
from that first nudge
in a swelling tummy,
acknowledging an unborn miracle.
From intense pain, then newborn softness
and a completely new kind of love.
I'm from kissing wispy, soft baby's hair,
and from growing children,
frustrations, heartache and sacrifice,
giggles, cuddles and mischief.
I'm from losing myself...
I'm from rescued cats and devoted dogs
and beautiful, dopey brown eyes.
I'm from ocean walks and sunsets,
and tides catching us out as they turn.
I'm from kicking through leaves,
golden, red, russet and brown,
and splashing through puddles,
letting the joy of life infuse me.
I'm from breaking down and lifting up.
I'm from hopes and dreams
and rediscovering myself...
I'm from rainbows and dragons,
putting words on paper
and creating worlds of my own.
I'm from adventures and excitement,
passion and spirit,
love and laughter,
(originally written in 1996 and added to in 2012)